While He Sleeps
by poryu
Summary: Fifty years had come and gone. But Kaname still hadn't awakened. And now, Zero was dying.


**Author's Notes:** This story has been stuck in draft form for _months_ now, so I thought I'd finally just post it already. Hope you guys enjoy! Warning: this is not a happy story.

 **Disclaimer:** Characters belong to **Matsuri Hino**.

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The room was cool, dark. Heavy, scarlet velvet curtains hanging over the windows kept the bright sunlight firmly out, unable to touch anything in the room. Back in the day, these curtains had often been drawn back, windows open to allow fresh air and the sweet sounds and scents of nature to sweep through the area.

However, that had been many years ago. These windows had been shut for decades. If anyone tried to open them now, the rusty hinges would probably creak and groan in protest, having lain unused for so long a period.

The room's owner was lying in a luxurious bed, a graceful four-poster that took up a good part of the floor space. His eyes were closed, features relaxed and peaceful in sleep. Under the soft blankets, his chest rose and fell steadily. His soft, even breathing was the only sound that broke the dead silence of the room.

A frail, thin hand reached out slowly, resting lightly on the cheek of the slumbering vampire. A thumb rubbed gently across the surface, a soft touch of affection.

Both skins were pale, but where one was smooth and flawless, the other was wrinkly and covered in small, brown age spots.

Zero gazed down tenderly upon Kaname's face, a small smile upon his trembling lips. His failing vision meant that he could no longer see him as clearly as he had before, but that did not matter. The ex-hunter's memory served him well. His mind was able to automatically enhance the blurry outlines that his eyes _could_ make out, projecting a crystal clear image of his lover across his mind's eye. His fingers ran expertly up and down, tracing the beautifully-sculpted features and mapping out the face that he knew so well.

A sudden tightness in his chest had the ex-hunter stiffening in pain, a low grunt escaping from his throat. Despite the way his body shuddered and trembled, he forced himself to stay upright, keeping his hand on the pureblood's cool cheek.

The pain was excruciating, and would have been debilitating for anyone else. But then, Zero had always had a high tolerance for pain. Or perhaps it was simply his innate stubbornness that kept him going, that allowed him to continue touching and connecting with his lover in the only way that he could.

It had been so long, but he could still remember how Kaname had used to chide him for being so hard-headed. Yet, despite his exasperated shake of the head, it was only affection and tenderness that ever swam in those deep, enchanting eyes. The pureblood had been so patient with him, so loving, even though he had been intentionally antagonistic at times. Kaname had never blamed him or pushed him away, even during the toughest times of their relationships, when it seemed like _everything_ was going wrongly.

They had been so happy, thought Zero fondly. Despite the pain raking through him, the smile on his face never faltered as he continued to gaze down at Kaname. He had never thought that things between them would ever lead down such a path. With its unexpected twists and turns, life had taken them, sworn enemies, and turned them into the lovers that they were now.

The pain intensity unexpectedly spiked up again, and Zero's heart skipped a beat, sputtering at the unbearable sensation. One hand slid up his chest, clutching it desperately, as if that would help lessen the agony.

Breathing heavily through his mouth, Zero kept his eyes riveted on Kaname's form. Concentrating on the other's peaceful features did wonders for his emotional state, even if it could not in any way improve his physical well-being.

He remembered being so angry, at first. Coming home from a hunt one day to find that Kaname had just gone into hibernation like that, without so much as a heads-up... He had been ballistic. Days had turned into weeks, and Kaname showed no signs of waking up anytime soon. Zero had been on edge the entire time, teetering between fury and anxiety. He had tried talking to him, pinching him, _hell_ , he had even tried cutting him a little with an anti-vampire knife.

But nothing had worked. The wound had swiftly healed, leaving no trace behind. The pureblood had remained blissfully unconscious.

As the days passed, Zero had finally settled on worry as his principal emotion. Kaname had never gone into hibernation without telling him before, except when severely injured and his body required mending.

Still, even then, he had always awoken within a few weeks.

Shouldn't he have already awakened?

It was only later that he found out from Seiren that the hibernation had not been by the pureblood's own choice.

 _'_ _It's called The Evolution Sleep. After purebloods progress from adolescence into adulthood, their bodies need to shut down and deal with all the new developments, as well as the wear and tear. It's a very important process that they must undergo so that their bodies will be able to last for the centuries ahead,' said Seiren matter-of-factly. She seemed almost surprised that Zero had never heard of such a thing before._

 _Zero frowned at the news. It was true that this was the first he'd ever heard of this, but then, his hunter training had ended rather prematurely. It came as no surprise that there was a lot lacking in his knowledge of vampire practices. 'But why didn't he warn me?'_

 _Seiren's expression turned thoughtful. 'It's possible that he did not notice it was time. Usually, once his body turns eighteen, the pureblood will settle himself down for the hibernation. However, Kaname-sama has been putting it off for years. As such, this came over him suddenly. It was something he had no choice in, something he didn't realise would happen.'_

 _'_ _Then, how long does this sleep usually last?'_

 _It had only been for a second, but Zero noticed how Seiren's eyes darted away uneasily, before she schooled her features into a calm mask._

 _'_ _It varies from pureblood to pureblood. I cannot say for sure.'_

 _Zero's eyes narrowed, his voice hardening._ 'How _long, Seiren?'_

 _With a small sigh, she lifted her head to meet his gaze. This time, Zero could clear see the empathy in her usually-emotionless eyes. 'Typically, it lasts for about fifty years.'_

 _Horror coursed through Zero, his blood pounding loudly in his ears._ ** _Fifty years?_** _How the hell was he supposed to live out his life for fifty years without Kaname? Without hearing that silky voice, without seeing that breath-taking smile? It was impossible!_

 _'_ _But,' continued Seiren, not yet finished speaking. 'When a pureblood enters into it unconsciously, it's hard to say. It could be much shorter, or...' She trailed off, knowing that Zero would already understand what she meant._

 _'_ _Or it could be much longer,' finished Zero hollowly._

The first few years that had followed had been terrible. Despite the emptiness in his heart, he had forced himself to go on living, knowing that that was what Kaname would have wanted him to do. But there were days where he looked at the vampire sleeping peacefully in his bedroom, and all he wanted to do was to punch the daylights out of him. No matter what, how could Kaname have just left him like this, all alone? He had promised to always been by his side... had he forgotten that already? Kaname had the strongest will and control of anyone that he knew. Shouldn't he have been able to find a way to escape from the forced hibernation somehow?

Did he not remember that Zero was here, waiting for him?

Or did he just not care?

Some days, Zero was so overcome by loneliness and anger that he would march into his bedroom. He would straddle the pureblood, his hands curled into fists so tight that the knuckles turned snow-white. He would grab the front of Kaname's shirt, the other fist preparing for impact...

...but he never could go through with it.

The whole situation sucked, but it wasn't Kaname's fault. He just could not bring himself to hurt the pureblood. Not anymore, and not like this.

Things never got any easier, but Zero had gradually gotten used to it. Living his life as before, but without his infuriatingly arrogant, yet passionately in love with him, lover as company.

Every evening when he awoke, Kaname would be there in his bed, sleeping soundly.

Every morning when he returned, the pureblood would still be there, in exactly the same position.

Nothing changed.

With every year that passed, Zero's faint hope that Kaname would be awake any day soon had started fading, slowly but surely. For a long period of time, he had tried his best to avoid the pureblood's bedroom, only going in there when his need for blood became unbearable. He'd had to force himself not to go in there every chance he got to check if he was awake.

It had been incredibly hard - close to impossible, really -, but it made things a little easier, if he could just not think about the fact that his lover was permanently asleep.

Sleeping through these years that Zero would never get back.

Still, Zero had made the most of the ill fate he'd been handed. He had tried to keep himself optimistic by counting down the years, his hopes growing as the numbers crawled up to fifty.

But then...

Fifty years had come and gone.

Kaname still hadn't awakened.

Zero had been so weary of life by that point. He had tried his best to live on, for Kaname's sake... Spending all night going on hunter missions, working himself to the bone so that he would barely be conscious enough to realise that, every morning, he returned to an empty house with a sleeping, unreachable lover. It had severely worn down on his mood, affecting his concentration and work. His was an empty existence, one where he was miserable and alone.

It wasn't so much living, as it was simply surviving.

 _For Kaname,_ he reminded himself every evening when he woke up, trying to figure out why the hell he should get up and begin another day. _It's_ _for Kaname..._

It had all worked, somehow. Until... he had gotten sick.

That was what the vampire doctors called it anyway. While hunting a stray E originating from abroad, Zero had been distracted for a second. It had only been a split second, but that had been more than enough for the desperate vampire to get in a brutal bite. Of course, Zero had ultimately finished him off.

But it had already been too late. The venom in the E's blood had already entered his system, infecting his body's cells and mutating them at a rate unmatched by anything ever seen.

The hunter had been unconscious for days, trapped in a nightmare of cold, swirling darkness. Pain had torn through every single one of his nerves, the cruel sensation the only thing that had been able to penetrate through his unconsciousness, torturing him endlessly.

He had finally woken after a week, surrounded by Kaname's inner vampires. All of them had been immensely relieved at his wakening... but when he asked what was wrong with him, their gazes had all shifted away uneasily.

In _pity._

It was only after Zero's many heated insults and threats that Aidou had accidentally blurted out the truth.

Kiryuu Zero, hunter-turned-vampire... was vampire no more.

Apparently, the vampire that had bitten Zero had been carrying a rare strain of virus, one that somehow had the ability to reverse the vampiric transformation of an ex-human. It was something even the best scientists could not wrap their minds around, a mechanism so complicated and unheard of that it baffled the entire vampire scientific community.

For so many years after his turning, Zero had yearned to be human, to return back to his original state. But after he had found happiness with Kaname, he had come to accept his vampire nature - _welcome_ it, even. If not for his vampire side, he would not have been able to form a blood bond with Kaname. He not be able to engage in their blood-sharing acts that they both enjoyed so much. And most of all, his vampire side was what allowed him to prolong his lifespan, allowing him to dream of many more blissful years with his practically-immortal lover.

But now, with this... everything had changed.

Zero had forgotten what it was like to be human. The reduced endurance and strength had been difficult to get through, but the hunter had managed somehow. There were times when he missed those aspects of himself, particularly during a gruelling hunt, but then he would shake himself firmly. He had been born _human_. Those were not natural things for him, and he should not have been hoping for them, even in the slightest.

After what had happened, he could no longer bear to stay by Kaname's side. How could he ever face Kaname again? How could he explain to his lover that, while he had been stuck in hibernation, Zero had returned back to his vulnerable form, one that would simply up and die in a few decades?

He hadn't meant for it to happen, hadn't even _wanted_ it to...

But it _had._

Zero had not even been able to keep himself safe while awaiting his lover. Such a stupid, useless fool - he did not deserve to remain with Kaname.

And thus, despite the protests of the other nobles and his own breaking heart, Zero had rented a place close to the Association, going there to sleep and rest.

But he never moved his belongings out of his and Kaname's house.

More decades had passed, and Kaname still hadn't woken. Zero got older and older, weaker and weaker. It was a natural progression of life, one that all humans dreaded, yet had no choice but to accept.

But to the hunter, it was only something that pushed him further away from Kaname.

And now, he was dying.

No one had to say anything, but he knew. Another fifty years had gone by, and his body was old and bone-weary now. It could no longer keep up with the younger hunters. Rather than being asked to leave, he had quit the Association on his own.

Zero had wanted to stay away. After all, what good did it do for him to return? It was too late to hope for anything now. Even if Kaname woke... they could no longer continue the relationship they'd had before. Zero was _old._ Old, weak and ugly. There was no way Kaname would even want to _look_ at him, let alone kiss him. If Zero knew what was best for him, he would just hole himself up alone till death eventually claimed him.

Regardless, the deep yearning to be with his lover had been irrepressible. It was the only thing that occupied his thoughts, nearly driving him crazy from the incessant desire.

And so, Zero had given in.

He returned to Kaname, who was still slumbering on. And everything was as if he had never left.

 _Except that he was dying..._

Zero turned his head slightly, his hand sliding further down the pureblood's cheek, down to his neck. This was the spot he used to bite Kaname in, he remembered faintly, prodding it lightly.

His diminishing eyesight failed to notice the slight twitch of Kaname's fingers.

The pain was so bad now, too much for even _him_ to take. He slid down from where he was seated against the headboard, until he was lying on his side next to the pureblood. It hurt so much...

A harsh cough racked through his weak, frail form. Fire spread from his chest, licking and devouring his entire body. He shuddered uncontrollably, muscles spasming wildly.

As his vision began to waver, he shifted closer to his lover, resting his head against Kaname's shoulder. Taking a deep breath, he filled his lungs with as much of the pureblood's familiar, tantalising smell as he could.

...before he no longer had the ability to do even that.

'Kaname... I'm so sorry I didn't wait for you...' whispered Zero, his voice coming out as a raspy wheeze. The ghost of a smile flitted across his lips. 'I hope you will find happiness after I'm gone... Do it for me, okay?'

As the human watched the pureblood silently, a sudden blurriness took over his vision, obscuring his view of his lover. He was well aware that this impediment was not something he could ever again control, but the instinctive reaction to blink rapidly was a difficult one to ignore.

So he closed his eyes, instead. It felt a little better that way, not having to force his eyes to stay open. After all, his memory gave him a clearer and more accurate picture of the pureblood than his eyes could.

Than his eyes _ever again_ could.

So tired... A wave of lethargy washed over Zero. He felt unbelievable tired... A white haze was beginning to fill his mind, making him feel as if he were floating, perhaps on a river. He wanted so badly to just drift off to sleep. Here, lying next to his beloved, it felt like he was finally home again. Warmth, protection, love - Kaname had always offered these readily to him.

He only hoped that he had managed to offer the pureblood those as well. God knew he hadn't been the best lover. Kaname truly deserved so much better than him, thought Zero wryly.

A yawn pushed itself past his lips, reminding him again of how worn-out his mortal body was.

Just for a little while, then. Perhaps the next time he woke, the pureblood would be awake as well...

 _'I...Kaname,'_ murmured the human, already slipping into unconsciousness. The words wouldn't come as easily as they should, but Zero struggled to get them out anyway. He didn't want to sink into oblivion before telling his lover something he'd not said for a very long time now. Something he had tried his best to avoid all these years.

Not when he wasn't sure if he would ever wake up again.

' _I...I love...you...'_

The corners of Zero's lips quirked upwards in a brief smile of triumph. At least he could still do _this_ much, huh?

But all too soon, his body slackened.

And then everything turned dark.

...

...

...

 _'Zero...'_

A name, whispered in a soft sigh.

And then Kaname's eyes opened.

 **END.**

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Another depressing story... T.T I'm not sure if I managed to evoke the emotions I was trying to, though.

Tell me what you guys thought! And thanks so much for reading this! :)


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